Happily Ever After
Looking beyond the numbers as retirement approaches.
- CategoryAdvertorials
- Written byCarol Wilshire, CFP®
- Photographed byFabien & Laura Castro
Retirement planning is a team sport. Many couples do an admirable job of planning financially for retirement. They save, invest and ultimately implement a plan to ensure financial security, usually with the help of a trusted financial advisor. But navigating life in retirement can present other challenges.

Even in the strongest marriages, retirement can reveal differences that money alone cannot reconcile. One spouse may dream of finally being able to travel the world, while the other longs to spend their time at home gardening or babysitting the grandchildren. Perhaps one spouse wants to continue to work, as it provides a sense of purpose and fulfillment. However, this may come as an unwelcome surprise to their partner.
No two individuals are completely in sync, and their differences can become magnified in retirement. While spouses may be financially ready to retire, they may be emotionally unprepared to do so. Open, honest communication early in the retirement planning process can go a long way toward smoothing this major life transition.
“Helping couples align their finances with a shared vision brings satisfaction and meaning to the retirement journey.”
Failure to communicate while planning for retirement may signal even greater relationship risk. While the overall divorce rate in the United States has declined steadily since 1980, divorce for seniors, known as gray divorce, has increased. According to Bowling Green State University National Center for Family & Marriage Research, divorce for those ages 65 and older has tripled since 1990.
A holistic financial advisor can play a valuable role in facilitating conversations to allow both partners to share their vision of what retirement looks like for them. Both partners can express why they are choosing retirement now and discuss the specific activities they envision for themselves on a daily, weekly or monthly basis.
The advisor can encourage couples to discuss experiences that they would like to share in retirement, as well as activities they would like to pursue independently—“we time” versus “me time.” Couples will not have identical goals, nor should they. But through open and honest communication, they can achieve compatibility to move forward in their retirement journey.
When financial advisors facilitate these conversations, it transforms them from portfolio managers to life coaches. They provide a platform for spousal engagement that no algorithm or robo-advisor can ever match.
Lifestyle conversations can and should take place alongside financial discussions leading up to retirement. Preparing financial projections is crucial, as they reveal the probability of achieving certain financial goals during retirement years, such as the amount of net income a couple may receive annually.

But just as important is identifying the activities and lifestyle that the couple’s finances must support going forward. If traveling the globe will be a shared pursuit, planning to fund that travel needs to be factored into a couple’s pre-retirement planning. Additional saving and investing before retirement may be encouraged or required. If travel is a shared priority, one spouse may agree that the other can continue to work part-time to provide for and enhance their shared travel experience.
“Retirement planning is a team sport.”
On the other hand, if both spouses rank spending more time at home with family or pursuing meaningful charitable endeavors highest, they may have the opportunity to retire earlier.
For couples, retirement planning should not be a solo pursuit. It is a shared vision that requires teamwork and communication. Financial planning can ensure financial survival. Couples who align their finances with a shared vision enjoy satisfaction and meaning on the retirement journey.
Carol Wilshire is a Certified Financial Planner™ and managing director at RBC Wealth Management based in Manhattan Beach. She has assisted couples in planning for successful retirements for over 25 years. Disclaimer: Investment and insurance products offered through RBC Wealth Management are not insured by the FDIC or any other federal government agency, are not deposits or other obligations of, or guaranteed by, a bank or any bank affiliates, and are subject to investment risks, including possible loss of principal amount invested. RBC Wealth Management, a division of RBC Capital Markets, LLC, registered investment adviser and Member NYSE/FINRA/SIPC.
Carol Wilshire, CFP®
RBC Wealth Management
carol.wilshire@rbc.com
310-341-6663
us.rbcwealthmanagement.com/carol.wilshire
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